Jeannette visits Jonathan in Montreal and they get their fill on leafy greens in their winter coats. Jeannette commits the ultimate faux pas while not understanding what that means since she doesn't speak French. Another round of F*ck, Marry, Kill (nut edition)! We get into hazelnuts and the plant's ultimate reproductive power play, while discovering their global impact and why one chocolate spread controls the world’s hazelnuts. We also look into why Oregon calls it their state nut and what they used to call their state nut. Finally, the sluts learn about Celtic Tree Astrology and why Jeannette will probably never be happy.
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Sources
https://oregonhazelnuts.org/about/
https://www.tytyga.com/History-of-the-Filbert-(Hazelnut)-Tree-a/383.htm
Find your Celtic Tree Sign: https://www.treecouncil.ie/celtic-tree-astrology
https://tree2mydoor.com/pages/information-trees-celtic-tree-calendar
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Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
We continue digging into our bag of trail mix and explore the world of the flexisexual apricot. But first Jonathan and Jeannette update us on their gardens and share their stone fruit “zodiac” placements. We go over the cyanide wellness craze apricots were at the pit of in the 70s and find a surprising US Marine apricot superstition.
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
After complaining about kids these days, Jonathan and Jeannette dive into the history of the cacao plant and how that became the chocolate we consume nonstop today. We answer questions like "How many cacao pods did it cost to hire a sex worker in the Aztec empire?" and "Is white chocolate actually chocolate?" We also discover the tiny, nasty pollinator that is responsible for every yummy chocolate treat you chew. And we find out if your fancy, overpriced chocolate is really anything special.
Sources:
https://worldwidechocolate.com/magazine/what-type-of-chocolate-matches-your-zodiac-sign/
https://www.chocolatescorecard.com/
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
Peanut sex gets wild in this episode! First, we try a new segment to find our sun-moon-rising Plant Placements and Jeannette tries more yard debris with Nipplewort! Will her nipples ever recover? Jonathan finds Montreal's peanut connection and Jeannette dives into the history of peanuts as a crop in the US. Jonathan also gives us the truth about these "nitrogen fixing" plants and whether we need to rotate our humble hobbyist garden beds. Absurd amount of singing in this one.
Let us know your Trail Mix Plant Placement on instagram: @plant.sluts.pod
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Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
The first in our Trail Mix series! It all starts and ends with seeds. We discuss which new seeds we’re trying this season and defend Jonathan’s AI garden organizing system. Jeannette tries purple dead nettle from the backyard and Jonathan talks about which seeds need to get cold, broken, and swallowed to germinate. We go into the future of seeds and the difference between seed banks, seed libraries, and seed sanctuaries. Jonathan gives us some tips for saving seeds and Jeannette shares a spell for planting on March 19th (the new moon and last frost date in Salem).
Make sure to subscribe and rate wherever you listen!
Sources:
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
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Make way for tulips! In this episode, Jonathan bravely downs a comically overstuffed cup of foraged weeds and spills the tea on a secret teenage adventures through milkweed forests. Meanwhile, Jeannette attempts to separate art from plants… and immediately falls headfirst into the drama-filled rabbit hole of Semper Augustus and full-blown Tulipomania. Along the way, we assign tulips their astrological sign and see how well it lines up with Jonathan’s birth chart. Expect history, horticulture, astrology, and at least one questionable beverage choice.
Send us your embarrassing Garden Tea to [email protected] or slide into our instagram DMs @plant.sluts.pod.
Sources:
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Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
We’re back with Québec ’s favorite uncut berry: haskap. This episode spirals from Jeannette's forgotten Brussels sprouts to Jonathan's most unhinged greenhouse hack yet. Jonathan also spills some political Garden Tea. Then we get into haskap: why Québec growers are obsessed with it and why it's still on the dating apps.
Got garden drama? Send your Garden Tea to [email protected]
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
Jonathan and Jeannette make preparations for the inevitable apocalypse in this bonus winter cutting episode. They don't figure out a source for fresh water but herbal Xanax is ready to go. Jonathan reinforces his rooftop empire while Jeannette considers potentially talking to her neighbors... if it's like a *bad* apocalypse.
Plant Sluts is back February 4th so start cranking your battery powered radio now!
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
In this bonus winter cutting we talk about gardening indoors aka houseplants. We go into the origin and psychological grip they have on us. We ask, are there native houseplants and how prolific is the mall plant aesthetic? We discuss the problems you can run into when bringing the outdoors inside and why they may not be the great gift you think they are (unless you're Jonathan's mom).
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co
In this episode we learn about Jonathan’s secret life as an oil baron. Jeannette will leave the leaves, so everyone please just shut up about it. We find a new community garden character trope and ask big questions like: are you a Thanksgiving marshmallow family?
In our plant spotlight we talk about the original cranberry sauce and how the American colonists capitalized on indigenous knowledge and slavery to create their yummy cranberry desserts. We explain why cranberries need our vibrators and ask, “Did our favorite 90s HBO series cause the downfall of US wetlands?” Listen 'til the end for Jeannette’s famous cranberry sauce recipe!
We’ll be going dormant for the winter but keep subscribed for Winter Cuttings!
If you have any Garden Tea, send us an email to [email protected]
See you in February!
Jeannette’s sources for her cranberry dissertation:
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https://www.npr.org/2006/11/23/6529449/a-cranberry-story-from-the-home-of-the-pilgrims
https://westernfinancialgroup.ca/Cranberries-Grown-Harvested
The Larry Meiller Show from Wisconsin Public Radio 10/21/25
https://www.apsnet.org/edcenter/apsnetfeatures/Pages/Cranberries.aspx
https://blog.library.si.edu/blog/2017/11/14/native-fruit-cranberry-seasons/
https://foodprint.org/blog/cranberries-bogged-down-in-water-and-pollution/
https://horticulture.wisc.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/20/2014/04/Cranberry-cold-hardiness1.pdf
https://publications.gc.ca/collections/collection_2009/agr/A118-10-6-2008E.pdf
https://plentifulearth.com/magickal-correspondences-of-cranberries/
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