Jonathan and Jeannette make preparations for the inevitable apocalypse in this bonus winter cutting episode. They don't figure out a source for fresh water but herbal Xanax is ready to go. Jonathan reinforces his rooftop empire while Jeannette considers potentially talking to her neighbors... if it's like a *bad* apocalypse.
Plant Sluts is back February 4th so start cranking your battery powered radio now!
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In this bonus winter cutting we talk about gardening indoors aka houseplants. We go into the origin and psychological grip they have on us. We ask, are there native houseplants and how prolific is the mall plant aesthetic? We discuss the problems you can run into when bringing the outdoors inside and why they may not be the great gift you think they are (unless you're Jonathan's mom).
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In this episode we learn about Jonathan’s secret life as an oil baron. Jeannette will leave the leaves, so everyone please just shut up about it. We find a new community garden character trope and ask big questions like: are you a Thanksgiving marshmallow family?
In our plant spotlight we talk about the original cranberry sauce and how the American colonists capitalized on indigenous knowledge and slavery to create their yummy cranberry desserts. We explain why cranberries need our vibrators and ask, “Did our favorite 90s HBO series cause the downfall of US wetlands?” Listen 'til the end for Jeannette’s famous cranberry sauce recipe!
We’ll be going dormant for the winter but keep subscribed for Winter Cuttings!
If you have any Garden Tea, send us an email to [email protected]
See you in February!
Jeannette’s sources for her cranberry dissertation:
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https://www.npr.org/2006/11/23/6529449/a-cranberry-story-from-the-home-of-the-pilgrims
https://westernfinancialgroup.ca/Cranberries-Grown-Harvested
The Larry Meiller Show from Wisconsin Public Radio 10/21/25
https://www.apsnet.org/edcenter/apsnetfeatures/Pages/Cranberries.aspx
https://blog.library.si.edu/blog/2017/11/14/native-fruit-cranberry-seasons/
https://foodprint.org/blog/cranberries-bogged-down-in-water-and-pollution/
https://horticulture.wisc.edu/wp-content/uploads/sites/20/2014/04/Cranberry-cold-hardiness1.pdf
https://publications.gc.ca/collections/collection_2009/agr/A118-10-6-2008E.pdf
https://plentifulearth.com/magickal-correspondences-of-cranberries/
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In this episode we get spooky as Jonathan plots garden revenge on his ex, we whisper to our dearly departed plants via an online Ouija Board, and divine the mysteries of the dormant season with tarot. Plus, we spotlight pumpkin-- the berry you've probably never eaten. Jeannette digs into the haunted history of the jack-o-lantern (even if carving one still kinda sucks).
Sources:
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Jonathan complains about tiny melons and Jeannette has to decide which plant can fulfill her needs in F-M-K Plant Edition. We explore Witch Hazel and where it got its demonic name. Jeannette reveals one of her vintage new age books and we continue to personify plants with the zodiac.
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Our latest episode kicks off Spooky season and includes an uncomfortable conversation with an arborist. Jonathan brags about his nonna's smuggled plums from the old country. We read terrifying Garden Tea sent in by a listener and pronounce all the medicinal compounds in American Skullcap perfectly on the first try ☠️
Correction: Jonathan said cinquefoil in reference to bunch berry (cornus canadensis) but he meant quatre-temp. Mes excuses les plus sincères.
Visit Astro.com for your free natal chart.
Information from this episode comes from: https://www.gaiaherbs.com/blogs/seeds-of-knowledge/american-chinese-skullcap-what-s-the-difference https://www.gaiaherbs.com/blogs/herbs/american-skullcap
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In this episode Jonathan talks about the origins of the mulberry nursery rhyme and Jeannette finds out if it's a bush or a tree... Jonathan's pretty beans are a hit at happy hour and we read some devastating Garden Tea.
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We relax with lavender, and talk about the different types and tips on growing your own. A new segment debuts! Fuck, Marry, Kill: Plant Edition. Take a peek at the connections between lavender, Jonathan and Jeannette’s astro birth charts.
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Jeannette heads to agricultural bootcamp, Jonathan drags GMO propaganda, and a chewed-up bird sparks a hawk-related identity crisis. Meanwhile, primrose struts onto the scene kinky, poly, and radiating pure femme energy.
Note: the book on botany referred to is in fact 'A Gardeners Guide to Botany'.
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Roses are red, but the history is unsurprisingly gay. Jeannette contemplates opening up her marriage (mainly to get out of doing dishes), while Jonathan reveals that not all thorns are created equal - every rose just has its prickle.
We dig up the potentially queer-coded roots of Salem’s garden history, including Elizabeth Lord and Edith Schryver: pioneering women in landscape architecture... or just very good friends? Plus: wartime rose protection tactics, botanical sex sprays gone wrong, and the lingering haunt of rose energy in the bedroom.
Sources: 🌹 Portland Parks – International Rose Test Garden 🌿 The Lord & Schryver Conservancy
Find out more at https://plant-sluts.pinecast.co